The core of the Ombud’s mandate is to help resolve interpersonal disputes in a consensual and impartial manner. To this end, the Ombud offers mediation services, which can take the form of a facilitated conversation, shuttle mediations (good offices) or more in-depth, structured mediation.
Mediation may seem to be a well-defined process, to be conducted within a pre-agreed framework and requiring specific skills and qualifications. This is the case for the mediation offered by the Ombud. However, conflicts need to be caught in their very early stages and can sometimes flare up so quickly that planning mediation by the Ombud is not the most effective way to address them.
As a manager, you may find yourself in a position to step in and address a conflict between members of your team. Below are a few guidelines to help you do so, based on the same principles as the formal mediation process that is promoted by the TCM group. Trust the process – it works.
Acknowledge what is happening. Recognise that a difficult conversation is going on and ask the supervisees in conflict whether they would like you to help resolve it. They may say no, which is acceptable as long as it does not affect others in the team.
Talk to them individually. Take them for coffee out of their workplaces, so that they feel safe discussing the issue. Ask them what happened and what they observed. Be an active listener; do not interrupt and offer suggestions. Summarise what you have heard to check that you have understood. Remember that the superpower of the mediator resides in listening and never taking sides!
Organise a joint meeting. Bring them together in a neutral place. Get them to agree to basic rules such as confidentiality, respect and no interruption while the other party is speaking. Let both have their say in an open and honest exchange. Encourage the parties to describe what has happened, what impact it has had on them and what they need to recover a good work relationship. Reflect what is said to make sure that you and the parties have a common understanding of what is exchanged.
Focus on the future. Once the two parties have expressed their views and the way they feel about the situation, you will probably feel that the tensions are released and the parties progressively open up to dialogue. It is time to focus on what they would need to happen next in order to be able to move on and beyond the conflict. The solutions have to come from them, not from you.
Handle heated exchanges. They are normal and to be expected, so keep calm. Acknowledge the strong emotions, affirm it is OK to feel angry/worried/upset, and find out more about why those emotions are erupting at this point in the conversation, as the heart of the problem might lie right there.
Follow up how the situation evolves. Once the two parties have reached an agreement on how to move forward, make sure you follow up in the next days or weeks. If you see problems reappearing, it may be worth having another round of mediation.
As a manager, you have an important role to play in the informal resolution of conflict and may find yourself in the position of accidental mediator. As a supervisee, you may see the need for help in conflict resolution and ask your manager to step in.
The few steps outlined above will help maximise the chances of successfully resolving the conflict. You are welcome in the Ombud’s Office to discuss your experience of conflict resolution and what has worked or not worked for you, and to seek guidance on how to prepare for such mediation meetings.
Laure Esteveny
I want to hear from you – feel free to email ombud@cern.ch with any feedback or suggestions for topics you’d like me to address.
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